Sometimes Center Bands Work?

[jj9ball]

Here is one that looked really awesome (in my head) before I turned on the lathe and started making it. I tried to laminate a center band and I think I just made it a little too fat. I'd love to know what you guys think. The pen is just under 6" capped and just over 5 1/2 uncapped. It has triple start threads and a medium two tone nib. If anybody has any idea what is wrong with it visually I'd love to know... this is a real head scratcher for me...

[Inspector]

Remember you asked.

 

I like the pen overal but I would have preferred a black section or made of the same swirl as the cap and barrel. To me, the white rings should have been narrower, perhaps with the black a little wider because the rings are too even in width as is.

 

Pete

[hari317]

I think the pen is very nice, it is the clip shape that I did not like that much. maybe a conventional ball end washer clip might have looked better?

[amk]

It's a nice pen, but I think one thing that slightly unbalances it is that you have that big pair of white rings at the centre, but there's no white at either end of the pen to reflect it. That addition might have made the pen more successful.

 

That said, don't beat yourself up, it's a nice little beast - I would be happy to take possession of it if you really don't like it

[basterma]

The white bands are too large for me. However they could use a groove to lessen the impact. You could also have a black band that sticks out a bit with the white bands tapering down to the width of the barrel and cap.

[Ted A]

I have absolutly no training at all to rely on, but it seems to me as if what is happening is that there is too much visual activity and no chance for the eyes to rest. The cap and barrel have lots of movement. The section adds more movement/change. I think if the band was a single color, probably black to match the ends, it would give the eyes a chance to land and rest a bit. With a more ordinary pen, it's the band that creates the motion or change because everything else is vertical and the band changes that for the horizontal to create the visual "excitement" and then one gets back to the vertical again. With all of the swirls in this pen, the eye is moving all of the time and the band makes the eyes some more, because there's a change. But there isn't any kind of landing place.

[TheRealScubaSteve]

I'm with Inspector on this about the rings. For me, my eyes immediately focus on the center band, which I think detracts from the interesting pen body. Such a band might look much better on a more conservative color design, but overall it is still a very nice pen. I don't mind the section being a different color at all.

[linearM]

I think a transparent green section (same material as finials) would have worked better. Overall it makes me think of peppermint Christmas candy. I do think the cap bands are just too overpowering, seem to break the pen in half.

Edited October 1, 2014 by linearM