(drum roll) the salad spinner centrifuge

[amh210]

So I got out my small rotary drill gizmo. Sort of like a Dremel tool, xcept I told SWMBO that it was a birthday gift for her, a "nail polish buffer." Got out some kite string and my old Boy Scout Handbook and conjured up a way to lash the FP to the mini-circular saw. I used a square lash, "wrap it thrice, frap it twice" and two clove hitches.

 

The drill is a cordless rechargeable model so I left the whole thing to charge for a few more hours. Variable speed, too. I figured if 8,000 RPM was good, then 36,000 RPM would be fabulous.

 

Remembering the grass clipping mess in the dining room I wized up and went into the yard (grass still looked lousy), held it high over my head and started her up. Seemed to work fine up to about 10,000 RPM and I noticed that no more ink was coming out. Couldn't be empty already, I thought so I figured it was time for more oomph. Cranked her up to 36,000 RPM and noticed some vibration which soon went away.

 

After 4 minutes of this my arm started getting tired so I released the trigger and waited for it to slow down. Much to my surprise, "Look Ma, NO PEN!"

 

Dual Hypotheses:

 

1, spinning a pen at 36,000 RPM violates Einstein’s Laws of Relativity and the pen has transmogrified into a hitherto unknown dimension.

or

2, Lashings gave way and pen flew off without my noticing due to the vibration and the remaining kite string.

 

Quickly I reviewed the scientific method and determined I'd have no way to test the first hypothesis without risking another pen. Wouldn't do that. Guess that's why it's called a null hypothesis.

 

Strolled around the tiny yard and pondered my predicament. Maybe those crazy European engineers would send me their pens to test? After all, I think I had a working system if I could only correct this multi-dimensional physics problem.

 

Started thinking about what sort of post to the Marketplace would flood my mailbox with pens looking to disgorge their ink for the sake of science.

 

#2, I found my pen. It was embedded in the white California stucco outer wall of my house. It was embedded past the section, halfway up the barrel. Figuring I finally had a good use for those funky section pliers, I extracted the pen from the house. Very nice, clean hole. Clear through the wallboard or whatever it is that they use instead of lath.

 

Pen looked pretty good to. A few surface scratches attributable to gentle desk wear, would make a good user. Filling system intact. Completely ink-free.

[Dillo]

:roflmho:

This reminds me of Dillo's ceiling fan centrifuge. I guess his wallpaper is plastic-coated

Hi,

 

Ack, no wall paper, but then, there is no ink in the pen or the there is a peti-vial over the nose of the pen securely strapped to the fan. But be sure to balance it out with a few like pens on all five blades if you have five blade fan, and watch your head for flying pens. :ltcapd: (umm, yeah, seriously) If you have six blades, strap either two or six pens to balance the fan out. And remember, strap a container onto the nose of the pen to catch the ink or, tut tut, it looks like rain!

 

Dillon

[wdyasq]

I'm wondering if duct tape will hold a couple of pens to an airplane prop? Or, maybe tape them to a motorcycle wheel. Couldn't be any worse than the trail left by old chain lube.

 

Ron

[BillTheEditor]

Griz' concerns about imbalance in the helicopter. Where's the old spirit of adventure gone ?

Spirit of adventure? Death wish is more like it. Among fixed wing pilots on the USS Constellation (CVA-64), you often heard helicopters referred to as "50,000 parts supplied by the lowest bidder, flying in close formation." :blink: No thanks!

 

(Yes, it was a long time ago -- 1970. The Connie is now awaiting the breakers, to be turned into washing machines and cheap automobiles.)

[Gerry]

Thread moved to repair from Chatter due to the high quality technical repair advice contained therein (Notably Ron's initial post although there were also some thought provoking ideas provided by some of our more inventive members).

 

Bumped to the head of the queue just to make sure everyone gets a look....

 

Regards,

 

Gerry

[KendallJ]

Hey Ron, I just made one of these this weekend and it rocks!

 

10$ salad spinner at Linens & Things, plus I used the ends of 2 silicon funnels. The funnels grip the nib section well. Talk about clean pens!! Thanks for the advice!

[Nihontochicken]

Well, I must admit I was inspired by these tales of inventive genius. Of course, my immediate Home Improvement reaction was, "More power!" So I was discussing this with my neighbor, Faiza bin Unladin, who mentions he just happens to have a high speed centrifuge he is about to ship to his cousin in Iran. Wow, talk about luck! So I ask whether I can use it to test its pen cleaning efficiency. He says okay, and so we put in two 51 Vacs opposite each other for balance, and start her up. After a few minutes, we shut her down, and look into the steel holding tubes. Didn't see any pens. Hmmmmm. We inverted the tubes, and some ink ran out, but nothing else. Well, with a bit of banging, out came two nondescript blobs of plastic and metal, each with a little ink stained depression at one end. So I guess it worked after all, apparently all the ink came out of the pens. I wonder whether this idea is patentable.

[Maja]

Well, I must admit I was inspired by these tales of inventive genius. Of course, my immediate Home Improvement reaction was, "More power!" So I was discussing this with my neighbor, Faiza bin Unladin, who mentions he just happens to have a high speed centrifuge he is about to ship to his cousin in Iran. Wow, talk about luck! So I ask whether I can use it to test its pen cleaning efficiency. He says okay, and so we put in two 51 Vacs opposite each other for balance, and start her up. After a few minutes, we shut her down, and look into the steel holding tubes. Didn't see any pens. Hmmmmm. We inverted the tubes, and some ink ran out, but nothing else. Well, with a bit of banging, out came two nondescript blobs of plastic and metal, each with a little ink stained depression at one end. So I guess it worked after all, apparently all the ink came out of the pens. I wonder whether this idea is patentable.

That machine sounds like a WMD to me!

 

(not trying to start a war thread, folks )

[amh210]

Alert the MT Strike Force Omicron. Alpha through Mu are busy northwest of Japan and another didn't respond to the page on Skype.

 

A rogue centrifuge that eats pens is a worrisome object.

 

Andy

[Ruaidhri]

Andy,

 

My apologies (nothing new so !) I keep forgetting to have Skype running.

 

I was worried about the infringement of Murphy Towers' patents until I read

we put in two 51 Vacs opposite each other for balance, and start her up. After a few minutes, we shut her down

and realised Nihontochicken's model is female so no conflict of interest.

 

You will be aware from signals that we tested the WMD potential and found it was nothing more than we already had, from a destructive point of view.

 

Regards,

Ruaidhrí

[BernieB]

Greetings and salutations!

 

My name is Bernie and my girlfriend is a die-hard fountainpenaholic.

 

I, on the other hand, last used a fountain pen in grade school, some 4 decades ago, and nowadays do most of my writing with a keyboard.

 

It's okay, she loves me anyway.

 

Recently, all of my girlfriend's fountain pens started to give her trouble, eventually causing her to resort to (shudder) a ballpoint, as they all now refuse to feed ink.

 

As my regular line of trade, when I'm not writing articles, books, or comedic forum entries at my own forums (www.spwaw.com) is that of being a home improvement contractor and general handyman. My girlfriend, like my youngest son, is convinced that I can fix/mend/repair/build/do just about anything, a belief that I do nothing to discourage as it causes her to continue buying groceries and feeding me between jobs.

 

In this case though, said belief has caused her to request that I fix her beloved pens.

 

Understanding that the affection she has toward her pens is similar in scope, nature and intensity to what Alaskan Grizzly bear mothers feel towards their young, I felt that the proper course of action here would be to get on the Internet and locate proper directions and guidance in the care and cleaning of fountain pens, before attempting to hook one up to my 3,000 psi pressure washer and trying to blow the gunk out.

 

That search led me here.

 

Believing, through my research, that the problem with her pens is a bad batch of ink which clogged them up (though she uses Levenger's finest, exclusively) I've been searching for the proper way to clean them. None of her pens are what a collector might call classic, nor are any genuine antiques, so I felt (after careful reading on the subject) that water cleaning was the safest way to go, always bearing in mind the grizzly bear aspects of the project.

 

Now, being in the construction trade, I tend to want to do things both correctly, but also with some degree of speed. Time is money, after all. While merely soaking the old ink out might have worked, it sounded quite boring and very inefficient. I felt that the task just screamed for a proper, and cautious, use of power.

 

Reading the thread here I realize that many of you must share the same belief, and I've been quite entertained, and intrigued, by some of the methods you've all devised. I will definitely give that salad spinner idea (pardon the pun) a whirl!

 

I wanted, before I go, to thank you all for a wonderful read, and to share with you some of my own ideas that I came up with prior to stumbling across this thread.

 

IDEAS:

• Two pens at once, mounted on opposing sides of a yo-yo. (Note to self: wear ink colored clothing)
• 3,000 psi pressure washer, pen mounted inside wand barrel
• 3,000 psi pressure washer, pen held inside rubber hose in path of stream (World's Most Powerful Blowgun! - sorry about your Toyota Mrs. Olinsky!)
• Pen attached to blade of reciprocating saw (Sawzall), trigger taped down
• pens strapped to rotating arms of dishwasher - Potscrubber Cycle
• "pen cleaning attachment" for Jacuzzi jet
• pens attached to tail rotor of "Marine One" - (She Who Buys The Groceries is a State Department Diplomat)
• BBQ Grill rotisserie attachment and 3 hp motor (heat helps I understand)

Again, thank you all for a most enjoyable read. Edited November 3, 2006 by BernieB

[BernieB]

Greetings again!

 

Just a quick note to let you all know I got every one of my girlfriend's pens working again... with a turkey baster.

 

All of the sections were soaked in moderately warm water for a couple of hours, then flushed through with water using a turkey baster from the cartridge end. Some of the pens, including a Waterman, needed overnight soaking, but the turkey baster worked great, allowing a good pressure flow forwards, and a gentle backflush when the bulb was released.

 

Every one of 'em (7 total) is now working perfectly again, and my GF is very pleased.

[southpaw]

Well Ron, I just made mine this afternoon and look forward to trying it out later in the day. Great idea to speed up flushing out pens properly. THANKS! (I'll pop back in later and let you know how it works.)

[Ron Z]

Sounds like BerineB is a candidate for MT.....

[KendallJ]

Bernie, I died laughing at your suggestions.

 

Your actual solution is a great one, and if you look on Richard Binders site, you'll see that he recommends and ear bulb. If you're not careful we'll soon have you regrinder her broads into stubs or italics.

 

Photo from his site at www.richardspens.com

 

http://www.richardspens.com/images/ref_info/care/bulb.jpg

[OnPoint]

Ammonia soak, floss, rubber bulb, and spinner: simplicity bordering on genius. Make intractable pens behave.

 

Thank you all.

[Ruaidhri]

QUOTE

Sounds like BerineB is a candidate for MT

 

Got it in one Ron

 

R

[southpaw]

I made one following Ron's instructions and I have to say, now that I have it, I can't imagine not having one! It makes cleaning so much easier and faster! THANKS RON!

[Inkquest]

Wow, finally, a use for that dust collecting salad spinner! I'll be trying my luck with this application as well.

 

Of course, I'll drill a small hole in the gold and silver caps so the ink can leak away before attaching the pen to a crossbow bolt mounted on a helicopter blade fired into a ball of plastique coated with napalm.

[amh210]

I still say you can't do much better than putting the pen in a condom and velcro-ing the whole business to the lawnmower blade.

 

PS: The condom is just to keep the grass from staining the pen when you mow the lawn.....