As my Esteemed Reader will be aware, all my Research is done in an effort to lighten the burdens carried by Mankind.
You will understand, therefore, how overjoyed I was late last night when Cuthbert and myself finally cracked the knotty problem of cold fusion.
Two bottles of our finest port were cracked open, and we retired to the Study, where we enjoyed a pipe and a well-earned glass (or more). Final notes were carefully jotted down and we retired for the night.
At six thirty am I awoke, to the song of birds and the sun streaming through my bedroom window. I (not surprisingly) loosed off two rounds from my 12 bore, slammed the shutters tight and went back to sleep.
Refreshed, and looking forward to finalising what would be a huge breakthrough in Modern Science, I awoke again at the more civilised hour of 11.
SHOCK! Followed by horror, bewilderment, worry, and several other things I simply can't be bothered to look up.
Nowhere could I find my notes. I called Cuthbert, to discover he was in the same distraught state.
Finally Suspicion reared its ugly head.
"Did you see papers on the table in the Study?"
"You did, didn't you?"
"WHERE ARE THEY?????"
"wot it is dat they are all gone - down de toylette"
I'm sorry. I can't continue this. I am far too upset.....................