I love all the disclaimers in this thread.
Translation: "Since you're asking, I'll give you my unprofessional and often uninformed and not-legally-liable advice: hit it with a blowtorch while lit (you, on booze) on a ladder and film it for us to laugh at." Gotta love the internet.
the disclaimers are really necessary...
granite is one of the most beautiful, because natural, but alas delicate materials to make a kitchen countertop with...
I used to have a pink black white granite top from stones coming from Sardinia in the kitchen, with time it has become stained with oil from cooking. There is no real way to make it come clean, although some of the mentioned remedies have some effect.
The problem with granite being a natural stone is that it is porous and not only it can be stained but also will lose shine with some of the cleaning products.
So I do recommend caution and best bet is to ask for professional advise, as I mentioned.
(When I recently changed my top, it I opted for okite, a modern synthetic stone made of quartz base, resin and coloured pigments, it is stain resistant to almost anything, very tough, and looks almost - but not quite - like granite.)