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Fountain Pens And Cancer


Bklyn

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While I didn't have much to add last time to the thoughts and prayers and well wishes of others, I still don't. Not because I am not thinking of you and your wife, and praying for both of you and the entire care team, but because so many others have said it all so well.

 

You, your wife and all of the care team will remain in my thoughts and prayers. Peace be upon you all.

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Just came upon this thread. I have nothing to add except to just be here and have you know yet one more survivor of cancer is standing here thinking of you and wishing you well. This is a time of great focus in your life, when it all seems to come down to a very few, very important things. You will do the right thing, whatever that is. Trust in yourself and those who support you to get you through the pain and fear and to the other side. You will not be the same, ever again, but that is not necessarily a bad thing.

 

I'm glad you have something you can bring with you to help you feel something positive, soothing, grounding. I'm also glad that there is a community here, which, while not able to be physically with you, we are all "here" for you. Times like this point out the strength of even the most superficial common bonds. The only real commonalities we all have here is a love of fountain pens, and our humanity. And that can be enough, at least for today, and maybe tomorrow. Maybe each day.

 

Andrew

 

“When the historians of education do equal and exact justice to all who have contributed toward educational progress, they will devote several pages to those revolutionists who invented steel pens and blackboards.” V.T. Thayer, 1928

Check out my Steel Pen Blog

"No one is exempt from talking nonsense; the mistake is to do it solemnly."

-Montaigne

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Bklyn...it is so very hard to watch the love of your life suffer...it is so very hard to say goodbye. I can certainly understand your fear of losing her. I pray that your beloved wife has the strength for the journey she is embarking on and that the good doctors and nurses will provide her comfort and support. She is very blessed to have you with her on this journey. I pray that you have the strength to ease her way. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers.

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My thoughts and prayers are with you and your wife. May your journey lead to peace and comfort.

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Bklyn, I'm sorry to hear about these developments. I wish you and your wife the best.

 

And, yes, I do use scribbling on paper with various fountain pens and inks to be helpful, and probably even psychologically therapeutic. It allows me to organize my thoughts, and it also is just a physical activity that is relaxing, most of the time. Flowing ink onto paper is a good way to keep ourselves going. To a degree it gets us out of our own heads in a way that we can't do otherwise, IMO.

 

Again, I wish you both well.

On a sacred quest for the perfect blue ink mixture!

ink stained wretch filling inkwell

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forgive me as I muddle through expressing a thought that is sometimes overlooked in worry, pain, and grief...

Wish I'd not been so exhausted during the last days of parent care so that I could have used pen and journal to capture the sweet moments..

Despite it all, there were many, and I still treasure these, but in memory only.

 

I also look back at that difficult time and think, while we sure wished the tough parts weren't occurring, (but not wishing time away), I feel deep in my heart it was a great privilege to be there, and also the trusted one for all the dignity issues. Every wish, as we all try, was fulfilled to the best of my ability. And now, all of it together is a surprising comfort.

Keeping your family, as well as all here, in gentle good thoughts and prayers with hope for the future.

p2p

 

I appreciate the kind words and thoughtful response. What a terrible nightmare for my family. Your thoughts are appreciated greatly.

Anyone like Ray Bradbury? Please read "The Laurel and Hardy Love Affair" if you have about 12 minutes.

 

You will not forget this wonderful gem that is largely obscure and sadly, forgotten. http://bit.ly/1DZtL4g

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I gotta add to this. I can't stand to see this thread end on such a sad note. Is your wife one of those mushy dog lovers? We have 5. We also have a cat named Grady. When I walk my dogs, Grady tags along. My neighbors think it's the funniest thing, seeing a kitty cat walk along with a bunch of dogs. My pit bull, named Pharoah, likes to irritate my two smaller dogs, Cleatus and Sheldon. Pharoah will push them down and when they get mad at him he'll run and they'll chase him. Sky is my Saint Bernard. She's ten years old and her hips are starting to go, but she's the matriarch and she keeps every body in line. Gladys is my Beagle basset mix. She has a thing for Pharoah. Theyve all been fixed, but Pharoah is a muscular stud muffin and Gladys is a chubby little hound. Makes sense that she's always sharing her toys with him. Cleatus is a Shitzu Yorkie mix. He's called a Shitzi poo. Sheldon is a Dachshund poodle mix. He's called a Dachsy poo. The neat thing about Baby Cleatus and Shey Shey is, When they walk with Pharoah, they're alittle more confident. They'll bark at another dog and dare him to mess with them. Alright, I'm not writing a book, so I'll end it here. HERE.

 

I love stories about dogs. I hope all of them are having fun and life is good.

Anyone like Ray Bradbury? Please read "The Laurel and Hardy Love Affair" if you have about 12 minutes.

 

You will not forget this wonderful gem that is largely obscure and sadly, forgotten. http://bit.ly/1DZtL4g

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You remain in our thoughts and prayers as you began another day. I wish you peace.

 

I thank you so much. Peace to come soon.

Anyone like Ray Bradbury? Please read "The Laurel and Hardy Love Affair" if you have about 12 minutes.

 

You will not forget this wonderful gem that is largely obscure and sadly, forgotten. http://bit.ly/1DZtL4g

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Keeping you both in prayer.

 

I thank you. That is so important to me and my family.

Anyone like Ray Bradbury? Please read "The Laurel and Hardy Love Affair" if you have about 12 minutes.

 

You will not forget this wonderful gem that is largely obscure and sadly, forgotten. http://bit.ly/1DZtL4g

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I had just been thinking the same thing. :thumbup:

I wasn't into pens when my mom died (ovarian cancer, after having been a 35 year melanoma survivor). But I brought a drop spindle and some silk fiber with me on the plane and used it there and in her room for the last day. It kept me sane (my flight to Newark was delayed and I had fears that I would not get there in time, and showed up at the hospital about 10 PM, and then at my parents' house around 10:30 without having let my dad know I was coming). I got to talk to her for a bit that night. By the next morning when my dad and i went back over to the hospital she was completely out of it.

It's very hard, and thoughts and prayers are being sent your way.

Ruth Morrisson aka inkstainedruth

 

Ruth, so sorry about your moms passing. So sad. Your thoughts and prayers are so important. Tonight is her first night in hospice. It is a beautiful place. I think that hospice is a good place for her right now.

Anyone like Ray Bradbury? Please read "The Laurel and Hardy Love Affair" if you have about 12 minutes.

 

You will not forget this wonderful gem that is largely obscure and sadly, forgotten. http://bit.ly/1DZtL4g

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LENGTH ALERT - a long and insignificant post - you can keep scrolling if you wish to!

 

So far I've been fortunate enough to avoid such situations - life of my loved ones has never been in danger and I hope it will stay this way. When my beloved great-grandmother was terminally ill, I was too little to understand everything, thus I have no bad memories.

However this year my horse died (I hope you don't find it inappropriate that I talk here about horses).

I loved her so so much - we created a unique bond and understood each other very well. I was always shy and insecure, I had few friends and a lot of worries, but she made me forget about all those bad things. I had many plans about the future and she always played a big role in them. People kept telling me that she was the most wonderful and sweet horse they had ever met - and I could fully agree. She was my best friend and I did everything I could to make her life carefree and painless.

Unfortunately, shortly before her birthday, she was poisoned (probably unintentionally). After a long fight for her life (she was very calm and brave, good girl), when everything started to look fine and she was supposed to come back home from a clinic, she died of heart attack. I was heartbroken. I thought I wouldn't be able to lead my usual life for some time. But then someone told me that he has never seen a horse which would live a better life. We've spend so many wonderful moments together. She didn't experience neither cruelty nor hunger, she was always safe and warm, she used to spend all her free time (and she had plenty of it) on endless meadows, playing with other horses and resting in a shade. She had the best equipment, high quality food and vitamins. Everyone loved her. And finally, she died very fast, probably not knowing what was happening, she didn't suffer much.

And then I realised that what really matters is the quality of life, not it's length. It is important to have goals, to be loved, to be kind, to have some nice memories, to feel excitement, to help others, to find joy and satisfaction in little things. Every beautiful life is too short, but we shouldn't be too upset about its shortness. There are so many reasons to be grateful for its beauty and the happiness it has brought to other people. We will all die - some of us will die very young, but surrounded by friends and family, some people will lead a long, but sad and fearful life... If someone makes us smile, we shouldn't feel too much pain once (s)he's gone. There's no need to turn the magical moments spent together into tears, because these are an eternal gift which we can treasure and pass on. Now when I think about my mare, I think about all the times she made me laugh; about all those amazing adventures we had together, all the calm evenings and lazy mornings. I am very proud of her and thankful that we could spend a few years together. It was a lovely period in my life and although it still makes me cry a bit, deep inside I am happy to bring back memories.

 

Stay hopeful - miracles do happen, no matter if we believe in them or not. And when they don't seem to be coming around, we should think if they haven't already happened quite a few times...

 

I'm happy to hear that FPs help you a bit. I feel the same about them.

 

Sorry for such a lengthy post! I'll keep my fingers crossed for both of you and everyone else who has such a terrible time.

 

I can't talk you enough for taking the time to write that story. It was simply wonderful. You are in Cracow. I would love to go to Poland someday. I hear such wonderful things about the people and the food beauty.

Anyone like Ray Bradbury? Please read "The Laurel and Hardy Love Affair" if you have about 12 minutes.

 

You will not forget this wonderful gem that is largely obscure and sadly, forgotten. http://bit.ly/1DZtL4g

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While I didn't have much to add last time to the thoughts and prayers and well wishes of others, I still don't. Not because I am not thinking of you and your wife, and praying for both of you and the entire care team, but because so many others have said it all so well.

 

You, your wife and all of the care team will remain in my thoughts and prayers. Peace be upon you all.

I thank you. Peace is what we all need.

Anyone like Ray Bradbury? Please read "The Laurel and Hardy Love Affair" if you have about 12 minutes.

 

You will not forget this wonderful gem that is largely obscure and sadly, forgotten. http://bit.ly/1DZtL4g

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Just came upon this thread. I have nothing to add except to just be here and have you know yet one more survivor of cancer is standing here thinking of you and wishing you well. This is a time of great focus in your life, when it all seems to come down to a very few, very important things. You will do the right thing, whatever that is. Trust in yourself and those who support you to get you through the pain and fear and to the other side. You will not be the same, ever again, but that is not necessarily a bad thing.

 

I'm glad you have something you can bring with you to help you feel something positive, soothing, grounding. I'm also glad that there is a community here, which, while not able to be physically with you, we are all "here" for you. Times like this point out the strength of even the most superficial common bonds. The only real commonalities we all have here is a love of fountain pens, and our humanity. And that can be enough, at least for today, and maybe tomorrow. Maybe each day.

 

Andrew

I thank you for your post Andrew. I never realized the link and sense of community we have. We are held together by far more than fountain pans. Far more.

Anyone like Ray Bradbury? Please read "The Laurel and Hardy Love Affair" if you have about 12 minutes.

 

You will not forget this wonderful gem that is largely obscure and sadly, forgotten. http://bit.ly/1DZtL4g

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I had just been thinking the same thing. :thumbup:

I wasn't into pens when my mom died (ovarian cancer, after having been a 35 year melanoma survivor). But I brought a drop spindle and some silk fiber with me on the plane and used it there and in her room for the last day. It kept me sane (my flight to Newark was delayed and I had fears that I would not get there in time, and showed up at the hospital about 10 PM, and then at my parents' house around 10:30 without having let my dad know I was coming). I got to talk to her for a bit that night. By the next morning when my dad and i went back over to the hospital she was completely out of it.

It's very hard, and thoughts and prayers are being sent your way.

Ruth Morrisson aka inkstainedruth

 

Ruth, so sorry about your moms passing. So sad. Your thoughts and prayers are so important. Tonight is her first night in hospice. It is a beautiful place. I think that hospice is a good place for her right now.

Anyone like Ray Bradbury? Please read "The Laurel and Hardy Love Affair" if you have about 12 minutes.

 

You will not forget this wonderful gem that is largely obscure and sadly, forgotten. http://bit.ly/1DZtL4g

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Just came upon this thread. I have nothing to add except to just be here and have you know yet one more survivor of cancer is standing here thinking of you and wishing you well. This is a time of great focus in your life, when it all seems to come down to a very few, very important things. You will do the right thing, whatever that is. Trust in yourself and those who support you to get you through the pain and fear and to the other side. You will not be the same, ever again, but that is not necessarily a bad thing.

 

I'm glad you have something you can bring with you to help you feel something positive, soothing, grounding. I'm also glad that there is a community here, which, while not able to be physically with you, we are all "here" for you. Times like this point out the strength of even the most superficial common bonds. The only real commonalities we all have here is a love of fountain pens, and our humanity. And that can be enough, at least for today, and maybe tomorrow. Maybe each day.

 

Andrew

 

I thank you Andrew. I hope you are feeling well. Cancer survivors are all around us. This community is so clearly bound together by far more than FP's. Be well.

Anyone like Ray Bradbury? Please read "The Laurel and Hardy Love Affair" if you have about 12 minutes.

 

You will not forget this wonderful gem that is largely obscure and sadly, forgotten. http://bit.ly/1DZtL4g

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Bklyn...it is so very hard to watch the love of your life suffer...it is so very hard to say goodbye. I can certainly understand your fear of losing her. I pray that your beloved wife has the strength for the journey she is embarking on and that the good doctors and nurses will provide her comfort and support. She is very blessed to have you with her on this journey. I pray that you have the strength to ease her way. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers.

I thank you my friend. You post means so much to me!

Anyone like Ray Bradbury? Please read "The Laurel and Hardy Love Affair" if you have about 12 minutes.

 

You will not forget this wonderful gem that is largely obscure and sadly, forgotten. http://bit.ly/1DZtL4g

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My thoughts and prayers are with you and your wife. May your journey lead to peace and comfort.

I thank you!

Anyone like Ray Bradbury? Please read "The Laurel and Hardy Love Affair" if you have about 12 minutes.

 

You will not forget this wonderful gem that is largely obscure and sadly, forgotten. http://bit.ly/1DZtL4g

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Bklyn, I'm sorry to hear about these developments. I wish you and your wife the best.

 

And, yes, I do use scribbling on paper with various fountain pens and inks to be helpful, and probably even psychologically therapeutic. It allows me to organize my thoughts, and it also is just a physical activity that is relaxing, most of the time. Flowing ink onto paper is a good way to keep ourselves going. To a degree it gets us out of our own heads in a way that we can't do otherwise, IMO.

 

Again, I wish you both well.

I thank you for your kind post. I also agree that it does get us out of our own heads and it is so easy to live there in a way that is not good. I hope you are well.

Anyone like Ray Bradbury? Please read "The Laurel and Hardy Love Affair" if you have about 12 minutes.

 

You will not forget this wonderful gem that is largely obscure and sadly, forgotten. http://bit.ly/1DZtL4g

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I can't talk you enough for taking the time to write that story. It was simply wonderful. You are in Cracow. I would love to go to Poland someday. I hear such wonderful things about the people and the food beauty.

No need to thank... I just needed to write it.

You are always welcome in Poland! [Alert: another long story! Completely off-topic this time!] Cracow is really lovely and beautiful, but many cities and villages are real hidden gems, just waiting to be discovered. Nowadays Poland struggles with some negative comments linked to the governmental changes. Well, all I have to say is that the Poles are a big and old nation with very little experience in democracy. They expected that their life would become much better after the end of the communist era, but actually it wasn't possible to make everyone happy in such a short time. In the beginning a group of pro-european businessmen gained a lot of popularity. They were promoting the idea of free market and hoping that the economical growth will raise the overall quality of life. Unfortunately, many people lacking economical knowledge and skills got engaged in some businesses, which have led a lot of them to ruin. For example they would hear about somebody making a big profit on warehouses and decide to jump on the bandwagon - soon there would be thirty big warehouses in a town of 20,000. Some people were making some really big fortunes, whereas some didn't find the right way of earning the money and were truly disappointed with the new reality. The communism guaranteed everyone a salary, an own flat, everybody could lead a similar life and quite a few people were really satisfied with it. Then it turned out that you can actually lose your job, and your neighbour can become a millionaire while you sit and weep. The previous governments made a big mistake - they didn't do much in order to satisfy these people. Finally they decided to take the reins and choose their own government, which would make them proud of the fact that they are Poles, give them some perks and say what they want to hear. The problem is that the new government seeks support in a big working class, which is not necessarily made of thinkers and economists. This leads to many misunderstandings and controversial decisions, which can be made because of the hope and naiveté of many Poles. I think these changes and fluctuations are an inevitable part of the big democratisation process. The vast majority of Poles is very kind, likeable and peaceable. I am overwhelmed with Polish creativity and will of changes. While the countryside is mainly conservative, in the cities you can find a wonderful mixture of enthusiastic young people of all origins and races. The nature is breathtaking, especially in the south (Tatry mountains, and the largely intact area of Bieszczady) and the north of the country (beautiful sandy beaches, dunes, forests, lakes...). The food is very nice, I agree. I travel a lot, but have never eaten a better bread or strawberries than in Poland. Polish cuisine can actually be quite interesting - I am not a big fan of it, because I'm not much of a meat-eater and I am careful when it comes to wild mushrooms. But I adore pierogi and the variety of Polish soups. Polish people love Italian food, so you can find many nice Italian restaurants. We have already learnt to like diversity in food - there are many nice places where you can try some French, Vietnamese, Indian, Georgian, Mexican, American, Greek food (and so on), as well as traditional classy restaurants with Old-Polish dishes and fusion brasseries. Poles like to experiment with food and have plenty of good quality ingredients to experiment with. We have also become real design lovers - people care not only about their clothes, but also about their homes. When I was a little girl, I remember a lot of ugly houses with interiors inspired by socialist realism, small gardens with no fences and hens running all around. This is not true anymore. What a big change in under 30 years. This is also true when it comes to language skills - my mother has never been taught English at school, now you can easily communicate in English with all the young Poles.

 

We'd be happy to see you :)

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I started my journals shortly before my wife was diagnosed with breast cancer. August 2010, same month I finally have up all forms of tobacco.

 

I had a Shaeffer Admiral that feel or of my shirt pocket and was run over the day of her first surgery. That pen had the cap destroyed and it stayed that way until she was free and clear from chemo a year and a half later. Danny repaired that pen twice during that time. It wanted to stay broken until she was fixed.

 

It was traded at the Dallas Pen Show after she was declared free. That pen that I traded for was given to a pastor at my children's church camp.

 

One thing I have discovered is that survivors and those left behind tend to fall into two camps. Those that realize that time is short and they should enjoy every moment. The others tend to become upset and irritated over, over ? I don't know what the ? is but they become mean and wallow in a depression that some never get out of.

 

I pray for a peaceful passing as I read that she is in hospice. I pray for a peace for you and your family as this is a most difficult time. Cherish the time you and your bride have had. Take these journals and write down all of your life experiences for your children and your children's children. I pray you continue to live your life knowing that your bride is safe and in peace. But most of all, I pray that you don't stop living.

 

P.S. I still those journals. I may go back and read them soon.

Peace and Understanding

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