Jump to content

The Fountain Pen Network uses (functional) cookies. Read the FPN Privacy Policy for more info.  To remove this message, please click here to accept the use of cookies

The Blogg of Me


Mabee He Is Fixed

Posted by eRnstMagillicuddy , 06 May 2015 · 5,514 views

Wot it is is wot Master was givven Big Red And White Pills by the doktor for de Black Madness.
Master did eat them red end first and he did go MAD.
Her Ladyship called the doktor imejitlee and told him to bring three botles of gin.
When the doktor camed wit the gin he did see Master of top of the sidebord and sed "wot is you doing up der"
Master sed speshial words wot I am not alloud to use and told doktor abowt the Pills.
Doktor sed "you ~@£$ eejit, you shud eat them WHITE end first" and went away.
Her ladyship did snorted aND GO TO hER cHAMBERS WIT THE GIN. Ow! I did hitted a butting wit CAPS LOCK On iT and my cap fell off! sTupid ting !!!!
Master is now down from the sidebord and eating them propperly and is normal again. He did only blow up one side of the Laboratorryoy this week.
I must go now cos it is time for my fish heads. Yum yum.


Master Was Sik

Posted by eRnstMagillicuddy , 23 September 2012 · 3,625 views

Wot it is is wot der was a teribel row and Master was loked up by doctors.

hE is out now and thE docktor sez he will be oK if he taks the medesin every day on the Big Spoon. de pRofesor is bak at work but has to take tabelts too, cos dey say "his nerves is shattered from deeling wit Master". Won of dde nurces went to Ostralia and tree others are stil out sick, but the HOSPITLE is stil open. so all is good.

Foreteen of my Masters bestest mirrors is broke and his carving tool is ful of dried blood and wont work at all.
His afce look funny cos someone stichted him wit a needel. Ha Ha Ha..........ouch!!

Her Ladyship did pay 150000 yeuroes to de juj and Master was put in a sylum for a bit. de Profesor sez he didded get all the badness out of him but i tink it was onlee the siky thing he was talking about.

siNed eRnst


Wher Is Master - A Esplanayshun

Posted by eRnstMagillicuddy , 15 January 2012 · 2,418 views

Sumbody rote and asked me where is Master.

Wot it is is wot we didded get ELEKTRIK in the Towers and Master was happy.
He didded by lots of sperimental tings and was in the Lavatory Laberoratr Lab for a long time.
Then he came out. He said tings is very black. I sed did you burn it down agen. He sed no it is just wot everyting is black.

For weeks he did reed bouques about the hed and brain. Then he sed wot it was is wot he had recesion.
I asked Doctor Seaneen Hempenstall-O'Rourke MD, BSc, and Member of the Irish Long Distance Armwrestling Team wot it was is recesion.
He sed No. Wot it is is depression (I rote that down).

He gived me pills for Master but Master sed it was OK he woud fix it himself.
He sharpened his skalpel and made a metel hook to get the bkack black out of his brain and made a little bulb and batery and some wires to plug into the ELEKTRIK to put in white.
There was blood all over the kitchen floor when he was finished and he sed OUCH.
I asked wot it was and he sed it was still all black but now it was hurty as well and eated the pills.
For weeks and weeks he eated the pills then went to the docter.
The docter was so delited wit his p[rogres that he sed he cud take two times as many pills as a prize.

I told Her Majesty abowt all this and she sed "Who?" and I sedded "Master" and she sed "Oh him!!". Then she gave me a present of a bottle haf full of gin wot hitted me on the hed but tasted nice.

When I get mor news i will tell you but i tink he is getting better and will say some tings himself.



The Big Red Wheel

Posted by eRnstMagillicuddy , 21 August 2011 · 2,203 views

I didded laugh today.

Der was a nok on thhe door and i answred it and it was a dUtchman and he was his name is WIM and he said is Your Master at home and i saide yes he is and the duTchman said I WANT TO SPEEK TO HIM" and i said ok and called Master and the duTchman sed "DID YOU TURN THE BIG RED WHEEL ON THE VALVE" and Master sed i did and the DutChman sed wot it is all gone and Master sed WHAT is all gone and the dutchman sed the BLOODY ADMIN NOTES and Master sed Oooops and the dutchman sed ihe has a bakup and they gived themselfs a big hug and had some tea.



Masteris Coming Home

Posted by eRnstMagillicuddy , 17 August 2011 · 1,885 views

Wot it is is wot He is coming home today from jale.

i have cleened the lab and polished his shoos so He will be happy i tink.

The cake didnt work cos a man fownd the file so Master had to stayi n jale for a week. he was not happy.

Her Ladyship laffed and laffed and laffed.

The guverment are not nice to Master sumtimes.

i will tell you more wheni no whats ahpening.



Mi Plan

Posted by eRnstMagillicuddy , 16 May 2011 · 1,856 views

Wot it is is wot my Master sed "I need sum rest and a bit of peece and kuquite"are you giong on HolydayMaster" i asked Him.He sedded "No. you are""Oh goody" I did say.i wneted on a big bote wit the turnip club to Foreign in Kent hunting turnips.in Forin ForeiGn I did dig and dig and dig.all the club peeple were supprised cos i founded a HUGE long black thin wiggley turnip under the ground wot i brawt home wit me and have in mi room.it was a lovly holyday.siGnedeRnst


Trubbel In Murphy Towers

Posted by eRnstMagillicuddy , 13 May 2011 · 1,764 views

we is all keeping our heds down today.Master is ANGRY and he is walking around muttering an trowing tings and using ROOD words.I heerd him say to cuThbert " Act 1 Seen 1 of king Leer" wotever that is. CuthBert didded say "yes, very sharp". i wonder wot they are talking about.Missus Her Ladyship has two sore foots as well an She cannot be goed neer.i hope tings will get bak to normel sooneRnst


It Was Not My Fault

Posted by eRnstMagillicuddy , 02 May 2011 · 1,611 views

Wot it is is wot He axed me to ring THE (my speling is getting beter) guverment an tell THEM it is ok wit THE QUeen of EngilBritti Next Door.

I ringed up and de man said "Wot?"
I said "The QuEEn ringed Murphy Towers and told Master 'WAR'".

He hung up.

Mrs QUeen always sais "We Are Right" to Master when they are having a laff on de fphonne.

He musted of been a silly billy.



I Is Findeketed!

Posted by eRnstMagillicuddy , 25 April 2011 · 1,930 views

Ha ha ha

Mi Master had to say sorree to me!!!!!!!!!!

He did writted wot i had lost his notes and i didnt.

Whem He and cuthbert dod rite the notes dey gotted very funny wit port. Master went to de toylet and he shouted "ERNST QUICK der is no toyulet paper here".
I did grab de nerest paper wot was on the table and slid it under de door.
Wot he did wit it i dont know cos de door was shut, but it wasnt me wot did it.

he was rong and i wos rite. HUrray



My Master Is Sik

Posted by eRnstMagillicuddy , 20 April 2011 · 1,539 views

Deer Peeple

do not pay two much atention to my Master - I tink he is atenshun seek looking for simpetey trying to get Her Ladyship to buy him pressies to make him better.

Her Ladyship said I am not to tell anyone dat She gived me 2 uro notes to say this so pleese dont tell or i am in TRUBEL.


Recent Entries

Recent Comments

August 2020

10111213 14 1516

Sponsored Content